


Give a Mouse an Iron Man

by AnonEhouse



Category: Beauty and the Beast (TV 1987), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Fusion, Crack Treated Seriously, Crossover, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-10
Updated: 2015-03-10
Packaged: 2018-03-17 04:34:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3515531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonEhouse/pseuds/AnonEhouse
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What if the nuke Tony carried sealed the portal, but didn't kill the advance squad already in Manhattan? What if Hulk saved Tony, but was too busy fighting to wake him up with HULK-BREATH? What if the rest of the Avengers had no choice but to leave Tony lying on the ground while they battled?</p><p>What if a Mouse was attracted to shiny things?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Give a Mouse an Iron Man

(If you are reading this on any PAY site this is a STOLEN WORK, the author has NOT Given Permission for it to be here. If you're paying to read it, you're being cheated too because you can read it on Archiveofourown for FREE.)

A manhole cover slid aside. A rumpled dirty blond head peeked out. A chitauri soldier flew by, impelled by Hulk's fist. The Avengers were fighting furiously. "Mouse doesn't like noise." The head began to retreat, but then popped up again and the scruffy young man grinned. "But Mouse does like toys. Big, shiny robot!" 

 

"Look!" Mouse said to Vincent. "Found a robot!"

Vincent looked down at Mouse and then at the armor clad body Mouse was dragging through the tunnels, which were rapidly filling with refugees from the surface. He knelt briefly and used his claws to pry at the edges of the helmet to reveal Tony Stark's unconscious face. "That's not a robot, Mouse. Take him to Father."

"Mouse found him! Belongs to Mouse!" Mouse pouted. 

Vincent patted Mouse on the shoulder. "No, Mouse. Take him to Father, and then come back and help guide people to safety. It's very important."

Mouse looked sulky. "Not supposed to let top people into the tunnels. Not safe!"

"Mouse," Vincent said softly. "Please?"

Mouse huffed. "All right, all right, Mouse does as Vincent asks. But first take Robot Man to Father. Yes?"

"Yes." Vincent ruffled Mouse's hair.

 

"What?" Tony opened his eyes. He saw a man wearing ridiculously old-fashioned, like something out of romance novel, clothes peering down at him through spectacles. He was holding a small oxygen tank, directed at Tony's face, which explained the cool breeze. Tony sat up in a panic. He felt a cool breeze all over. He wasn't wearing the Iron Man, just his rock concert shirt and trousers. "What just happened? WHERE'S my SUIT?"

"Apparently the city's been invaded by hostile aliens. You were brought to me suffering from mild hypoxia." The man pushed his eyeglasses back. "Your... suit is it? Your suit was damaged, so Mouse took it to repair."

"You gave my suit to a mouse?"

Another man spoke from a doorway that Tony hadn't noticed because the room, the ridiculously weirdly furnished room, was dark. Lit by candles. "Not a MOUSE. Mouse!" he said. "Mouse fixed it! Mouse fixed it good."

"Good. Give it back," Tony said, ignoring the unimportant, insane aspects, because hey, hammer flying Norse gods, portals to other worlds, freaky, ugly warrior _things_ dropping from flying giant centipedes? Yeah, waking up in Ren Faire was nothing.

Mouse pouted. "MOUSE fixed. Pretty. Mouse wants it."

Tony blinked. Obviously Mouse's batteries were low. Or he'd lost his wireless connection. "I'll make you something pretty, just for you, later. But I need my suit now."

Mouse shuffled his feet and then nodded rapidly. "Mouse says 'yes'. You promise? Pretty toy just for Mouse?"

"Absolutely, sure thing."

 

A week later after the last of the chitauri had been disposed of and things were returning to normal, Dummy gave an excited squeal, and began racing around the workroom, You right behind him. "PRETTY! Mouse can have?"

Tony turned, to see Mouse standing between his two bots, petting them. "You really wouldn't want them, they're stupid."

"Oh." Mouse frowned in thought a moment. Then he grinned. "Arthur! Make me robot Arthur."

"What's an Arthur?" Tony said, resigned to doing whatever it took to satisfy Mouse. Apparently Jarvis would NOT keep Mouse out of the workroom no matter what Tony said.

"My Arthur." Mouse held his hands a couple feet apart to indicate size. "He's a raccoon."

"Raccoon. You want a robot raccoon named Arthur. Sure."

"No, got one Arthur. Mouse wants robot raccoon named...." Mouse looked around the workshop. "ROCKET!"

"Fine," Tony said. "Rocket the Robot Raccoon. I can make it smart, but making it smart and nice at the same time, I don't know."

"ROCKET!" Mouse said happily, and then went over to poke and tweak at Dummy.

Tony grumbled, but after all, a promise was a promise.

**Author's Note:**

> Note: Wasn't feeling well, so I napped after eating, and this is the result.
> 
> Also Note: Yes, ok, Guardians of the Galaxy sneaked in a tiny, tiny, tiny bit. Not fair to tag it for that, but just so you know, yes, it was deliberate.
> 
> I haven't watched TV in decades, so I didn't know there was a B&B reboot. 
> 
> This is the wikipedia info on [ B&B the one I knew](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beauty_and_the_Beast_\(1987_TV_series\))


End file.
